Boosting Kids’ Confidence: 5 Strategies to Elevate Self-Esteem

As a counselor, play therapist and behavior practitioner with years of experience under my belt, I’ve come to understand the critical importance of fostering a healthy sense of self-worth among our young ones. Given their diverse backgrounds and the myriad of external factors that shape their self-perception, initiating conversations about self-esteem can be quite challenging. The usual questions like “How do you feel about yourself?” often yield minimal, non-descriptive answers such as “Good” or “Okay.” Through trial, error, and success, I’ve found a few key strategies to effectively engage children in meaningful discussions about their self-esteem.

1. A Playful Approach

In my experience, broaching the subject of self-esteem directly can be somewhat intimidating for children, especially for those grappling with self-doubt. I’ve found that weaving these discussions into playful, low-pressure activities can significantly lower their guards. Utilizing games with structured prompts not only makes the process more enjoyable but also less daunting. The game’s structure, where each participant takes turns, naturally diffuses the tension around the subject matter, making the serious topic of self-esteem far more approachable and digestible for the kids.

2. Harness Creativity

The influences on self-esteem are numerous and diverse. They span from internal traits like self-awareness and confidence to external factors. Indeed, this complexity offers many chances for creative involvement. I’ve asked questions such as:

• Imagine being a superhero. “What powers would you choose? How would you use them for your good and others’?” This question helps kids spot their strengths. They think about using them for everyone’s benefit. It’s a lively method to make them appreciate their unique skills and traits.

• Consider yourself as a tree. “Which type would you be, and why?” Think of your ideal environment, your leaves or fruit, and seasonal changes. This symbolic question makes kids ponder their growth and resilience. It ties these ideas to their self-view and world role.

• Think of a personal time capsule. “What three personal items would you include for opening in ten years? Why?” This encourages kids to reflect on what they cherish about themselves. It focuses on their positive aspects and achievements. This boosts their self-regard and prompts positive future self-views.

These questions have not just revealed children’s self-perceptions. They’ve also sparked more imaginative, reflective, and insightful discussions.

Creative Lessons to Elevate Self-Esteem

My go-to creative resources include activities such as

• “My Self-Esteem Spider Web” which explores positive self-talk using the example of a spider and it’s web. The more an individual tells themselves negative self-talk, the more it will stick. The more you tell yourself positive self-talk, the more it will stick. Just like that spider catching food in its web, once it’s cause it’s hard to get out. This activity helps to reinforce and empower the children with a choice to make – they either have positive or negative self-talk stuck in their webs!
• “My Self-Love Snowman” teaches children to cultivate a foundation of compassion, gratitude, confidence and self-love at a young age. Through this simple lesson and craft, children reflect and explore who they are, including their qualities and attributes and what makes them unique and special.
• My “Self-Esteem Sandwich” is a fun, engaging, creative and non-threatening intervention which is great for students to explore self-esteem strategies. Students create their own unique sandwich including the strategies that they find the most helpful for them such as being authentic, positive affirmations, listing your wins and accomplishments.

3. Offer Space for Reflection

Prompting kids to reflect on their self-esteem can be a tall order, challenging even for adults. Providing them with the time and space to contemplate these questions can result in more genuine and introspective responses. Utilizing “My Self-Esteem and Confidence Daily Diary” has been the perfect tool for this purpose. Utilizing daily prompts encourages children a reflective space to express and navigate their feelings about themselves at their own pace. It encourages children to focus on their own strengths and abilities, promoting feelings of self-worth, self-esteem and confidence.

Integrating play, creativity, and reflection into our discussions on self-worth has proven to be a successful formula in fostering a more open, meaningful dialogue with children about their self-esteem. My years of interacting with students have taught me that these approaches not only facilitate conversations about self-worth but also empower children to view themselves in a more positive light.

4. Encourage Role-Playing Activities

Role-playing activities offer a unique and dynamic way to explore self-esteem issues with children. By stepping into different roles, children can express feelings and face situations that might be difficult to discuss directly. This method allows them to explore various perspectives and solutions to problems, which can boost their empathy, problem-solving skills, and self-confidence. For instance, acting out scenarios where they need to stand up for themselves or help a friend in need can teach valuable lessons about self-worth and resilience. The key is to debrief after the role-play to discuss what they learned from the experience and how it applies to their own life.

One of my favorite group based creative interventions is called “I Belong”. It is a group based creative intervention which explores self-esteem which helps develop personal insights into their sense of belonging into the world. This is an interactive activity and only requires paper and pens/pencils. It does take 45 minutes to do but definitely worth it!

5. Practice Gratitude and Positive Affirmations

Introducing the practice of gratitude and positive affirmations can also have a profound impact on children’s self-esteem. Encouraging children to think about what they are thankful for in their lives helps shift their focus to positive aspects, fostering a sense of appreciation and contentment. Similarly, guiding them to create and recite positive affirmations about themselves can reinforce their strengths and positive attributes. This practice can be integrated into daily routines or as part of classroom activities. For example, starting or ending the day by sharing something they are grateful for or an affirmation can help instill a positive mindset and a stronger sense of self-worth.

I have found that these strategies help to offer a more comprehensive and multi-faceted approach to discussing and nurturing self-esteem in children. Each technique provides a different avenue for exploration and expression, catering to various needs and preferences, and together, they can significantly enhance our efforts to support children in developing a healthy and positive sense of self.